Things I would tell myself 5 years ago:

1. Just because you’re nice and selfless to other people does not mean they’ll be nice and selfless to you. There is no problem with being nice, kind, and selfless, but it needs to have boundaries.

2. Do not ever settle. You will be unhappy (or worse traumatized).

3. You cannot change a man. Your love won’t change him. People decide to change if they want to and on their own accord.

4. You’re not Jesus. You’re not God. You cannot save everyone.

5. Take people as they are. If someone shows you who there are, believe them.

6. Do not date for potential. Do not EVER marry for potential. You’ll potentially get hurt and traumatized.

7. Have Boundaries, Standards, and Expectations.

8. Not everyone keeps their promises no matter how much you remind them. If they can’t keep their word, leave them alone.

9. Never make room for disrespect. Communicate once on it and if they continue to do the same thing (even if it is wrapped in a different bow), leave them alone. They don’t respect you.

10. Don’t give men the benefit of the doubt. There are too many examples of how unhealthy men are dangerous.